Tequila Shots and Drunk Texting Woes

We’ve all done it. I know I’m guilty of it a few times. The plot of a seemingly perfect idea at the time. In the land of flowing martinis, tequila shots, and house music, the idea pops into our mind as the liquor god shines on us in support. The drunk text.

So we think about our idea for a split second, and in our alcohol induced state we seize the day, and everything in the world is rainbows. Right?

Wrong. Actually never right. I don’t care that Lady Antebellum sang about the drunken “needing someone at a quarter after one” and won multiple Grammys. Nor do I care that in the movies this state usually has men jumping fountains and racing to find “the one” when they realize what they have. The normal person that would most likely try this, would probably result in injury. However, it is that moment we watch in the movies (the part where they kiss in the rain), or listen to Lady Antebellum pathetically pining over someone trying to relate, where we put little notes in our head that life can be like that. Don’t think for a second that I’m judging. I have been both the reciever and the texter in those situations. As my father likes to say “Nothing ever good comes out from being out after 10pm until 5am”. Yes, he may be right, but in the “City that Never Sleeps”, staying in isn’t really an option. As young professionals, we thrive on the nightlife, the social scene, and the networking. More and more business partnerships are created over a martini than in a conference room. It’s the world we live in, our age, and in order to advance we have to conform to society’s expecations and regulations.

SO, you hear the sap songs, think of the sap “The Notebook” moments, and think “That could be me!”. Where our sober practical mind might laugh at the concept and daydream, our liquid courage begs to difer. It is our drunken doppleganger that remembers these ridiculous moments from media sources where we decide overall a drunk text would be a fabulous idea.

So you send it.

And you wait.

The waiting game of a drunk text reminds me alot of an 8 year old asking their parents on a road trip if “they’re there yet”. We hit the screen, check our texts, and turn on and off the phone to a point of battery exhaustion.

Three things could happen after you send the message.

1. You get a text back, you make bad decisions, and wake up the next morning minus a friend/relationship/walking the streets in the clothes from the night before with smeared eye makeup.

2.You never recieve that message. Feeling ultimately rejected/filled with ancient teenage angst, you proceed to drink more and wallow in your sorrows. Whether case you are, it’s not exactly your finest moment, and you have a whole lot of “explainin’ to do” in the morning.

3. You look like a drunk slob, and probably people won’t think of you the same way. Make sure to wear a hoodie and some big shades the next day, because you’re not going to want to be recognized.
So next time you’re excited about “living in the moment” and following Drake’s YOLO lifestyle, I say like most situations, keep it in your pants.

…I’m talking about your phone, don’t think otherwise. Although it goes for this situation too.

Next Day’s Shame



One thought on “Tequila Shots and Drunk Texting Woes

  1. Pingback: Guys and Gals Gone Crazy | NY Social Status

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