When a friend asked me about the logistics of a second date, all I could say was “just do you”.
In our ever changing rules in dating and match making, I couldn’t give them a proper guide book. The reason is, it’s there wasn’t one to hand out in a pamlet. At one point when pure chilvary existed, it was wrong for a girl to allow a guy to kiss her on the first date. Flash forward 20 years and the rule is the third date to wait until you sleep with them. This conversation with my friend led me to thinking about my last “first kiss” that led to a relationship. No, I’m not talking about drunken make out sessions. Obviously our society’s rules have adjusted them to make those moments not count, as they fade to the drunken “blips of bad judgment” in our minds.
Anyway, my last “date first kiss” was on a cold December day. Garland and Christmas lights twinkled on 5th avenue. We had been five dates in, and I was pretty sure if he didn’t kiss me then, then he probably didn’t bat for my team. So, when he finally did, in the rushed state of me hailing a cab, and the snow lightly falling, it was perfect. Although the relationship ended sourly, that one kiss was pretty damn memorable.
So, at the end of the day, don’t search for a guidebook rule to rule on how to date. Ask all your friends for advice, (or ask me!) and don’t be afraid for them to give you the honest truth. But, at the end of the day, they aren’t in that moment with your potential S.O. They aren’t seeing and feeling what you are. If you want to wait a date or five to kiss them, do it. If you realize your one night stand may turn into something, follow through. If you just want to play the field, then play..just don’t hurt others in the process (YOU know what I’ve said about those kinds before).
Don’t be the first to judge and don’t limit your playing field by a type.
You only live once.
Xoxo,
AM