In the never ending emotional roller coaster of love and relationships, we often wonder and second guess where our current path will take us. Will it end in marriage, or broken hearted hunched over a pint of Ben & Jerry’s? To avoid the latter, here are three signs of a failing relationship:
They go M.I.A.
When your current beau starts to go M.I.A., you start to wonder what the problem is. Gone are the days at the beginning of your relationship when you two were attached at the hip, finishing each other’s sentences, and having withdrawals when being away from each other for more than two hours. Now, you hear from them sporadically, communication is at an all-time low, and you know more about their life from a social media standpoint than from talking to them one on one. The opposite of love is indifference. If they don’t care to keep you updated, then they’re probably not caring in general. You’re not a captain on a sinking ship, and there’s no need to ride out a failing relationship. Move on.
They stop talking about the future.
Remember when you two once talked about the 2.5 children you wanted to have someday with the white picket fence? If you both stop investing in each other’s future life plans, it’s a sure sign things are going south. Conversations that used to be “when we” or “we will” promises and have turned into them saying someday “when I” or “I will” should absolutely raise a red “relationship fail” flag in your mind. Try to talk about future plans. If they say those the two dreaded word sentence of “we’ll see”, then maybe you should start thinking of yourself and your solo plans.
The Blame Game
Does it seem like you two are constantly fighting? Those little quarks of their personality have become annoyances and guilt trips? If so, it’s only a matter of time before you two split ways. Of course, it’s normal to have disagreements or arguments. As you progress in your relationship, issues such as money, living situations, future plans, etc. are not always going to be agreed upon. However, when they start to blame you for everything, or you start to become annoyed at the little things, it’s time to reevaluate your situation. If they start to attack your character traits, or make you feel incompetent, this is one failing relationship you should run away from. No one should ever feel insufficient to their partner. Every relationship goes through phases. If the arguments start to become more frequent than happy times, it’s time to end things.
The most important thing about any relationship is communication. Communication can solve any issue, and gives both parties in a relationship the feelings of security and establishes a bond. Communication should also be clear when it comes to your feelings. If you start to make excuses to yourself about your significant other, you need to take a good hard look in the mirror. Everyone is scared when they start or end a life chapter. It’s understandable for you to want to work through a hard spot in a failing relationship because of the time you’ve invested. However, if it becomes more about the lost time you’ve invested and less about the person you could potentially lose, it’s time to throw in the towel. You need to stop wasting their time and your own as well. Who knows who you could be passing up in the meantime?