Editorial: The Grand Old Douchebags

I am ENRAGED at Republicans once again. In the last week we have seen major efforts to destroy women’s rights at the hands of Texas Governor Rick Perry who is trying to force massive reform to abortion laws that would essentially force all abortion clinics in Texas to close, through the state legislature during “special sessions.” The only reason he failed last time was because of the brilliant efforts by State Senator Wendy Davis’ 11 hour filibuster and a gallery of protestor shouting their discontent at the pathetic Republican scum below. Perry has now called for another special session despite the thousands that are showing their support for Davis and against the bill.

While North Carolina is currently trying to sneak in a ridiculous abortion bill as well as Marco Rubio in the Senate, extreme abortion reform has already passed in Ohio. In the Ohio version of the bill they force women seeking abortions to now go through trans-abdominal ultra sounds before having an abortion, making them see the fetus and hear the heart beat just to add a little more pain to this already tough decision. They put Planned Parenthood last on the state’s budget list and also put RAPE CRISIS CLINICS IN JEOPARDY. Quoting an article I read on Huffington Post, “If these clinics are caught counseling sexual assault victims about abortion, they could lose their public funding, Reuters reported.”

Are you kidding me? I love that these degenerate right-wing sociopaths think that the most important thing in the world right now is attacking abortion clinics and rape crisis clinics. Because when a woman is going through the most HORRIFIC time in her life we should be trying to embarrass them and making them feel even worse.

These Republicans act like pro-choice people love abortion. Like women are running around getting knocked up and screaming “yippie” all the way to clinic. No women enjoys having an abortion, but sometimes it’s the right option. You know how many unwanted children we have in this world? Orphanages are over flowing with unwanted kids that will be products of the system discarded into the world once they turn 18. We have rape victims that these Republicans want to force to carry to term a fetus that reminds them of the worst time in their lives. These Republicans want poor people to be forced to have a baby if they accidentally get pregnant, so when they have the kid and need food stamps the right-wingers can turn around and scream, “NO FOOD STAMPS ON MY WATCH YOU FUCKING FREELOADERS.”

They want the government to stay out of everything until it comes to who you are having sex with, and what women want to do with their bodies. Nothing I am saying here is new but these assholes are getting worse it seems. The insufferable Sarah Palin said recently that if the “moderate” Republicans stop embracing the conservative wing of the party they will branch out and create a third party. GOOD, GO ON. Go be a third party and get 6 votes in Alabama and leave the rest of sane America alone. It is getting harder and harder to find a sane middle of the road Republican in today’s Congress but if the sane ones want to start winning elections on a national level again they need to ditch these tea party lunatics. Young people are becoming more socially liberal, it’s just happening, accept it. The majority of young people support gay marriage and a woman’s right to choose, accept it.

I’m over this shit. Can we let them secede please? To quote Larry David, “what’s the big deal with preserving the Union? Do we really need the south?” No, we don’t. And obviously not all southerners are ignorant right wing nuts, but you sane ones can come up here to the North. We’d be glad to have you. The right-wingers can all go down to Alabama and Mississippi and they can all sit in a group eating grits talking about how they hate gays, and making it harder for the 2 black people on their side to vote. They’ll be in heaven. Let them secede, let them bring the stars and bars back, that way they can’t hurt anyone. Because everyone who agrees with that Draconian way of thinking will be all hanging out with each other.

I can handle people who disagree with me on certain things but when your opinions infringe on the rights of others I have zero respect for them. The main point that bothers me the most is that all the things that bother these Republicans, gay marriage, abortion, reading, they don’t affect them. Gay marriage affects no one but the people getting married, abortion affects no one but the people involved. “WELL WHAT ABOUT THE BABY?!” Do you remember being a fetus? Do you remember being in your mother’s womb? No. It doesn’t feel anything during the current legal timeline, it isn’t aware, it isn’t affected.

Religion is the back bone to all these things right-wingers hate. Let’s say for the sake of argument god exists and if gays get married they go to hell and if a woman has an abortion she goes to hell. That STILL DOESN’T AFFECT YOU ONE BIT. They go to hell not you.

I’m rambling like always. Anyway, show your support for Wendy Davis at #istandwithwendy and follow her on twitter @WendyDavisTexas. And let her know you support her efforts and let Dick Perry know that you disapprove of him @GovernorPerry.


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