Advice in the AM: The “Post New Year’s Kiss” Effect

Well guys, welcome to 2014.

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For many of you, including myself, 2013 was not the best of years. As I approached the end of 2013, I had the “2013 go f yourself” mantra. Whether it was due to “unlucky 13”, or just bad luck in general, many of us were ready by August to crawl under the covers and not get out until January 1. I was more than thrilled to approach 2014 with bubbles (wait, LOTS of bubbles), smiles, and trying to find that lucky mister that I was going to plant one on at midnight. For a long time, New Year’s in New York City was something I would have rather slept through than explore and go out. Ticketed events start getting promoted in early November promising open bars and a dance party. You’re filled with promises of meeting “the right one”, dancing the night away, and going to the grand ball Cinderella style. In actuality, you’re stuck behind a crowd of tanked frat boys trying to get a drink for 30 minutes as they hog the bar. By the time you get it, you’re frustrated and want another one. Most of the people that goes to the ticketed events are in their early 20s and coupled off. As you scour room to room for a single “Mr. Right”, time slowly dwindles, and you’re left kissing the bartender with the unibrow.

Sound a little familiar?

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For those of you who still get caught up in the theme and glamour of New Year’s, the tradition gives me hope. We go out with our friends in our best wear, celebrate another year past, and look to the future with the rose colored glass lenses of prosperity and hope. We think of resolutions or goals to make sure this year is “the best year yet”. We promise shallow self promises like losing weight, growing our our hair, or trying something new. Some dream of finding love, others dream of loving themselves, and some are just plain happy loving their job,

I find it interesting to compare the story of Cinderella with our tradition of New Year’s Eve. Growing up, we dream of Cinderella finding Prince Charming at the ball. She dresses up, takes a chance, and falls in love after two slow dances and a twirl. What’s so different about the grand ball compared to New Year’s Eve? While Cinderella dreaded midnight because everything became fake, we approach midnight with excitement for the unknown. For those in singletown with me, you know what I mean.

However, after starting to really look into Cinderella’s story compared to NYE, they both question the “what happens now?” factor. After midnight, Cinderella was back to being a servant for her wicked stepmother. Her life went back to the way it was, and she lost one of her expensive glass slippers. Rookie move, Ella.

A New Year’s kiss won’t give you a Prince (or Princess) Charming. It won’t make you ride into the sunset and live happily ever after. Bring it back to the real world, and we start to question the same “what happens now” mentality. Will they ask you on a date? Will you never hear from them again? Will you wind up in their bed? To further part 3, will you wind up in their bed and LIKE it?  All the anxiety to find the right outfit, the right place, the right drinks, and the right person to kiss at midnight get washed away when the clock strikes twelve. We are either filled with glee because the one we wanted reciprocated our love, or we’re disappointed because they didn’t. Our decisions after that 2 second face battle or non existant face battle are due to the clock striking 12am.

For those of you waiting for your beloved’s message or those of you disppointed, know it’s a new year. It’s a new time period filled with endless possibilities, but you haven’t changed. When midnight strikes, we’re all back to the reality that we are the same person we started as at the beginning of the night. Whether we return back to a servant, a prince, or a hipster blogger living in Brooklyn, our lives are not magically changed by a Fairy Godmother. Regardless of our relationship status, the only thing we can truly promise to ourselves is keeping the NYE resolutions and following through.

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So here’s my Advice in the AM–

1. Live for you

2. Make resolutions you can keep and celebrate your successes

3. If you had a crappy New Year’s, know it can only go up from here.

4. If you had a great New Year’s, know that you started the year with great momentum, and keep the positive attitude

5. Celebrate you’re not living in 2013 #2013gofyourself

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